7 REASONS WHY YOU SHOULD FORGIVE
“It is the nature of man to make mistakes, to commit errors and atrocities that seem as if unforgiveable. Why we should forgive in such unforgiveable instances is divine.”- This is a common statement but just how much is this enough a reason to actually forgive someone who has erred against you? Let’s look into these reasons:
- CASTING THE FIRST STONE: It is an excerpt from the scriptures, “…He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone…” John8:7 (KJV) and it has become popular among people- the saying above, but how many times have we picked up the first stone and thrown at people because we were so disgusted at them and we couldn’t find it in us to forgive them. We in fact judge them immediately. The first reason is to ensure you are also looking at yourself with the same eye in which you are seeing an offender. The offender could very well be punished but most of the time in businesses and relations of other forms, let that punishment not come from you. At one way or the other we have been guilty of offending a whole lot of people even without meaning to. If you can’t cast the stone, find it in your heart to forgive.
- SAVE YOURSELF THE STRESS: if you remember the last time you decided not to forgive someone, you took it to heart, got hurt and even started avoiding the person, that way you couldn’t even forget the person. “Peace” as quoted by Mother Teresa, begins with a smile. You should forgive because not forgiving does a lot of harm to your physical and mental health. It takes away your peace. You aren’t the offender so you shouldn’t give in to worry. Smile and be at peace with whoever offends you.
- YOU CANNOT CHANGE WHAT HAPPENED: Imagine you took a long time to fetch a bucket of water, perhaps after waiting on a long queue, and then you got to the bathroom, you wanted to take a call and you stepped away for some few minutes. Some kids were playing football and unknowingly kicked the ball at the bucket. The force at which this was done not only spilled the water but broke the bucket (a plastic bucket). You would be very upset, definitely. You might want to hit the kids/even punish them but none of these would bring the water or the bucket back. It would all be futile. There are so many cases at which the only thing the offender may be able to do is to only utter sorry. It is always a terrible moment especially when it leads to the loss of someone dear but you find out that your life falls apart as you linger in revenge and in trying to change things. There is no medicine after death just miracles. Forgive, yes, it might be hard in such instances but think of a better day.
- THE HOPE OF SOMETHING BETTER: The reasons mentioned seem to be quite psychological but as you take your time, you realise it is a process. Hoping that something better will happen to you helps you to let go. Forgive because your tomorrow will be better than today. An unforgiving spirit tampers with growth because of the inability to let go but when you do let go to gain peace as earlier said, the hope of a better tomorrow is not far-fetched.
- FORGIVE, WHEN YOU LOVE: Loved ones hurt us the most and the hurt they bring causes estranged relationships which proves hard to conquer. The love you had or have presently is a basis for forgiving. Was there a reason why you loved in the first place? What is that reason? Dwell on this. Indeed, some people leave your life as you grow but when we speak of love, we speak of the true kind like that amidst siblings, best of friends, spouses etc. You know their faults but you love them. Love itself is hopeful and can turn back the heart of an offender so forgive. They have the ability to change.
- IT IS PROVEN TO BE A MATURE ACT: Overtime people who can forgive are considered as being mature. It improves their relationships with people around. It is a kind gesture to forgive not a foolish thing, as some people see it. Forgive and let go quickly, it helps even yourself especially when you make a blunder. Some people cannot even forgive themselves, you are able to forge on faster when you can forgive. Be mature, forgive.
- FORGIVE BECAUSE YOU HAVE BEEN FORGIVEN: Starting from God, you have been forgiven before you made the mistakes you have made. Aside God, personalities higher than you must have forgiven you (maybe not all but you have been forgiven too), so you need to also take the baton and also forgive.
On a final note, forgiveness is not easy but a summary of it indicates growth. People say an offence can break a relationship of any kind but true forgiveness can make that relationship grow in all ramifications. When we hold on to a hurt, we find more people to add into the category and before we know it, we have got a load on our backs and we become reluctant to drop it off. Forgiveness eases your pain, you cannot regret it even if the offender has more offences under his sleeves. They may leave your life but forgiveness helps you move on.