Me: Good morning dad.

God: Good morning Ada Nkem, how’s everything?

Me: We keep pushing dad, I came today with a pertinent puzzle. I need help.

God: I’m all ears.

Me: This issue of love and marriage confuses me a lot. You know, I used to believe you give us what we desire. Before now, I thought you will send me men with all the characters and qualities I want.

Now, when I see these men that have everything I want, for some reason it doesn’t click.

Then, you send me people I won’t cast a second glance at ordinarily. Daddy explains to me, please. I came ready today.

I won’t leave till I have all my answers.

Dad: Okay, this question is valid but only time gives you the real response. You only get to fully grasp it with time.

Me: Well… The thing is, I’m not leaving without any answer. I see married people talking about how the man/woman wasn’t what they wanted, but they “just knew”.  I don’t want that daddy, I want him as I want it. I deserve my choice.

Dad: That’s what I give, I give your choice.

Me: We can look at the records dad, which of them were?

Dad: No, no, no, don’t put this on me. You were with other men that I didn’t give you.

Me: Because they looked like what I wanted and I reasoned it was you.

God: That’s on you. But why didn’t it work out?

Me: Irreconcilable differences🌚. I dunno sha, something always happens. Something I can’t just sweep under the carpet, or daddy is it me? Is it that I can’t love people? Is it that I can’t get to commit?

Daddy: It’s not all that, the reason is simple. You don’t want to dig deep because you know deep down, that when you do, you will find answers and you are afraid of the outcome of those responses. You prefer to walk blindly; you prefer to just let life happen.

You know the right thing, but somehow not doing it makes you feel better. But then, that’s why peace has eluded you.

Me: There is been no truer words. I’m ready.

God: What do you think was wrong with Adam and Eve?

Me:  They don’t listen.

God: True, but you don’t also listen. What else?

Me: Daddy calm na, na I come to meet you o. No dey attack me like this. I don’t know what was wrong with them except disobedience. They were perfect people.

God: There you go; perfection was one of their problems.

Me: How?

God: I gave them everything they could ever want, and it gave them room to search for imperfection.  Perfection can be boring. Would you agree?

Me: Hmmm… I thought the daily strife is to get to perfection.

God: What are the memories that linger? Arriving at perfection or the journey to perfection?

Me: The journey… 

God: There you have your answer.

What does gold look like when you see it?

Me: A very dirty piece of metal.

God: What makes a refiner work on gold?

Me: Money?

God: Think my child, I know you know the answer.

Me: The perfection he knows the metal will achieve after refining.

God: If the gold was in its purest form from the onset, will it be this valuable?

Me: Well…

God: What comes easy is not always valued or appreciated, just like the Garden of Eden came easy for Adam and Eve, but their instinct wanted to still find more when they had it all.

Me: hmmm

God: Gold is valued because of its process.

To now answer your question. Yes, I give people their heart desires. I give them in a way they will VALUE and APPRECIATE IT.

All men are different and I connect to them according to the way their mind works.

Some people get what they want upfront because of the journey they have been through, their level of faith, their design. It’s different for everyone. 

But, they will still have to define what they want in the marriage.

Me: This is deep.

God: For others, I still give them what they want to be laced with the refining they have to do. This is why I say, time gives a full grasp. It’s in time you see, “THIS IS WHAT YOU WANTED but laced with the DIRT YOU NEED TO REFINE TO VALUE THE PROCESS”.

Those that have what they want upfront, have the DIRT LYING BENEATH. The thing is, THE DIRT IS ALWAYS THERE. But, the dirt comes to each man in a way he/she can handle.

It could be physique, finance, character defect, health, background defect… THE DIRT WILL ALWAYS BE THERE. 

The reason is simple…

Me: Perfection is an illusion and humans don’t value perfection except they understand the journey.

God: There you go my daughter.

Now, you fully grasp it.

For another, I might have explained further. But, I know this would do for you.

Me: Yeah, I get it.

God: Always remember, I know your innate desires and always provide them. At times you think your desires should come with your wants, but I know when your wants fade; you will hunger for the desire because that’s what you need. So, I bypass your wants if I see you are mature enough and give your desires.

Never forget, even when you get your desire, you still need me to work on it.

I created you in a way you can’t live without me.

Perfection makes you independent. A perfect life will give you no journey.

Me: I get it, I get it all.

Daddy: I love you.

Me: I love you more, thank you so much, Dad.

I will be back…

Conversation ends…

In one sentence, what was your take home?
Did you understand?
Do you have questions?

 

Written by:
CHINELO EKENTA
Creative Writer, Project Manager, Brand Manager.