HRP LETTER SERIES: LETTER TO MY FRIEND ABOUT SPEECH
It makes me elated knowing that I have someone right on your end whom I can share my deepest thoughts with. I do hope your week was filled with love because it is quite essential to the subject matter today, being, speech.
Not in a bid to digress, but love affects our speech and actions. It affects the kind of words we use, when we use them and how we use them. A friend of mine always makes an emphasis on the basics of speech, especially the tone at which you communicate your moods. And this friend would use the instance of “come here” meaning to actually make a move towards a person but when the person saying “come here”, shouts with his/her face outrightly showing anger the person being called becomes either afraid, sad or even anxious. Our speech, if not controlled, can express our moods without restrain.
What’s the essence? Carrying anger in your speech can invade the love between you and the people around you. Using negative emotions to speak can pass the wrong message even when the person you are speaking to has done something wrong. Worse is you can easily lose a person’s trust by how you speak.
Words could seem heavy or light by how you portray them in speech. They can also seem confusing and unclear when you let negative feelings in.
Over the years, friend, because of anxiety and worry of how people would perceive my ideas or thoughts, I found myself stammering when asked my point of view when hurt, over- exaggerating when angry and even shouting when really upset. The point is I usually passed no information to the receiver and it would have been better that I dealt with my emotions before speaking. Effective communication filled with love and in other words, understanding beyond yourself, cannot be accomplished amidst negative emotions.
Friend, I write to encourage you to be calm before you speak. Even when upset, choose your words and your tone wisely. Even when disappointed, it is possible to decide not to yell. Even when hurt you can decide to place your offender in the “love box”(acknowledge that you have been offended but choose not to grow attached to the hurt that it mixes with your emotional stability) and speak plainly.
Till we meet again, friend, beyond the use of vulgar speech, our plain words can carry so much weight and become offensive. Have selfcontrol, be calm and be emotionally stable before speaking. It might be hard at first but practice makes perfect. Feel free to drop a comment friend, and for personal questions, send us a mail at email@example.com or 09057180149(whatsapp only). Have a great week!
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