HRP LETTER SERIES: LETTER TO MY FRIEND SCARED OF ASKING FOR MORE
It feels great writing to you today more so, about a fear I might seem to share with you quite personally. I do hope your weekend was fulfilling, I’m writing to my friend who doesn’t feel worth asking for more.
Society, culture and family backgrounds have probably taught us to put others before ourselves; it’s seemed like a humble cause but many of us have taken it the wrong way. If you don’t love yourself, you simply cannot know what you deserve and in fact claim it. Furthermore, you can’t love/help anyone without doing so for yourself first.
Friend, you can’t be humble except you have a reason to be, many of us slip into mediocrity as a shield from having more, needing more or having people recognize that you have more and with this it is clear that humility and mediocrity are poles apart. A mediocre is a mediocre because he has nothing to show, he doesn’t strive to have and closes himself up from achievements so he doesn’t need to build capacity or survive amidst others—He is scared of more, he is not humble or he doesn’t qualify for the test of humility.
My friend who is scared of asking for more is scared of what people think: he doesn’t want to get into the bad books of anyone but he’s feeling crushed, she is scared of moving forward with her business and career because family ties might be burned, they’ll call her names because she’s too busy building her life to attend to every whim. So my friend would rather stay back at his/her current state. It’s not humility, it’s the fear of what more would bring so they don’t ask for it.
Friend, you for sure know you need more. An exercise that could help you terminate some of these excuses goes thus:
Get a pen and paper, list out some of the things stopping you from reaching for more. Next, tell yourself “10 years from now, they won’t matter”. A lot of the people you worry so much about would have moved ahead in life because they didn’t give a hoot like you did. People take advantage of people, people pull people down but intentionally, out of love and unintentionally. This is why decision making is mostly a personal thing, some people care too much that we end up failing them because of the advice they gave us or because we were trying to keep their good side.
Friend, asking for more is no sin, grabbing your future in your hands and making it great is in fact a great deal. Walk up to your fears and turn them around for your own good. Walk up to people who can help you, if one person turns you down, another will come to your aid, so relax. The major root remains how you think of things and what is really stopping you. Conquer the barriers in your mind, people will always talk and finally you can’t please everyone.
Be eager enough to move forward, that’s “more”, and ask for it when you see those who can help you get there.
Till we meet again, do send us a message telling us what you want us to write about next via firstname.lastname@example.org and do drop a comment. Finally, have a great week!
HIS RULE PUBLICATION.